MARKETING COMMUNICATIONS LEADER skilled at planning, creating, implementing and measuring communications in consumer and business markets.
Industry experience includes telecom, banking, utilities, business services, building materials and healthcare.
Key Capabilities
• Fractional Marketing Director
• Marketing Communications Project Management
• Marketing Research and Communications Measurement
• Agency and Vendor Selection, Direction and Evaluation; Vendor Contract Optimization and Cost Reduction
• Writing: Brand Definitions, Creative Briefs, Proposals, Online and Offline Content
• Coaching and Training
That’s right, while you were kicking back and enjoying the game, the food, and the ads, I was hammering out an Excel sheet. Here it is. You’re welcome.
Super Bowl LVI, Los Angeles, Inglewood, California, SoFi Stadium, LA Rams vs Cincinnati Bengals 13 February 2022
If you listen to The Ticket as long as I have, you don’t just acquire its vocabulary, you embed it in your brain, and you pass it on to those around you. Here’s a short list of stuff I say every day that will be in my head forever.
What about eggs? Champ, Champ! I hope you do. I hope you do very much. Spare Doing a bit Just like that, m___ [Coach Bob Knight’s expletive from the sand trap] Let’s go on to something more important, if in fact there is something more important to talk about Bullsh I got enough on my mind right now, I don’t need your b___ [old man to his wife] Get your ass hung up on now, you idiot Ya wall I wish we knew Tired-head Stop down Lay out A beating Cry face Hazmat uniform (in robotic tone) Stand back, Burrito Mark that under who gives a s**t What elssssse? Wheels off We’re having fun here, no? A shot? Turnt up
Uh, Paul, in uh…(when hearing a call for a moment of silence)
I thought I’d try my computer’s ability to take dictation, using Microsoft Word’s Dictate function and the speech recognition tools of my new computer and Windows 10.
I carefully and slowly recited, with painfully obvious pronunciation, the lyrics to an old classic. (No, I didn’t sing.) Here’s how it came out:
like the rolling stone by bob Dylan once upon a time you expressed so fine through the bombs and dined in New York flying that didn’t you? People call, Sadie where doll, you thought they were all kidding you. You used to laugh about everybody that was hanging out. Now you don’t work so well do know you don’t seem so proud about having to be scrounging for your next meal. How does it feel? How does it feel? To be on your home and what rolling stone a complete unknown with no direction home.
Mediocre, at best. Good thing I didn’t try “Subterranean Homesick Blues.” If anyone has suggestions on how to make this work better, I’m all ears.
The kiosk is dead. Long live the kiosk. Self-service IS customer service.
Update, March 6, 2019: I think the new technology that Kroger has introduced, including online ordering (click and pick up) and scan-as-you-go, may have eclipsed the need for the old kiosk. But I still miss it.
The high school graduates of May 2018 are about to move into their college dorm rooms, and many won’t be taking a TV with them. This year’s university freshmen don’t watch TV and don’t use TVs. Instead, they watch prepackaged video content, on demand, and on their laptops and phones.
In my survey of 36 new freshmen, all who are recent high school graduates ready to move into college community housing without their snoopy parents, 39% said they do not expect a TV in their college housing room. Fifty-six percent of female students surveyed won’t have a TV in their room. In a world of big high-definition televisions, these sharp-eyed young adults gravitate to the small screen. More than three fourths (77%) expect to spend most of their video-watching time on a laptop or desktop computer. Another 20% prefer their mobile phone, and only 3% rely primarily on a traditional or smart TV. Nobody watches video on their tablet or iPad.
We’re seeing a major shift not only in device preference, but in content selection as well. The new collegians are not watching live or same-day video. Eight-six percent of all surveyed and 94% of females say more than three-fourths of what they watch is not live and did not just become available that day. A study of viewing habits from 2017 showed teens spent 34% of their video time watching YouTube, 27% watching Netflix, and 14% watching live TV. Young people spend about twice as much time watching Netflix as live TV, and even more time on YouTube
They’re watching YouTube and Netflix on their laptops.
Broadcast and cable networks rely heavily on live sports to capture a real-time audience, especially during October when Major League Baseball reaches its crescendo and all forms of football are at full throttle. But only half of the rising college freshmen surveyed said they expect to watch 3 or more hours of live sports during the whole month of October. That’s not even one full college game. Whoa, Nellie, Keith Jackson, what happened to the young’uns?
There are big differences between men and women in this narrow age group. Seventy-eight percent of males plan to watch at least three hours of live sports in October, whereas only 22% of females expect to spend this much time viewing live games. And don’t forget about the game consoles like Xbox and PS4. None of the 18 females surveyed expect to have a game box in their room, while half the young men are planning to squeeze in some Fortnite or FIFA between study sessions. As a side note, those game consoles can also stream video services like Netflix, if you don’t mind using the clunky controller that’s better suited for Madden NFL 19.
The pipelines of content aren’t what they used to be. Only 23% of those surveyed expect to plug a cable into their TV. Only 11% of males and no females will have a Blu-ray or DVD player. When they actually use “a real TV,” these young adults rely on smart TVs and over-the-top streaming devices such as Roku, Amazon Fire, Apple TV, and Google Chromecast. With wall-to-wall WiFi on modern college campuses, we don’t need no stinkin’ cable.
I didn’t ask if anyone planned to use a TV antenna. I wonder if they know what one is.
A vision of TV’s future? The college class of 2022. They were born in 1999 and 2000. They’re changing the face of a medium we used to call Television, which we ought to start calling Video.
Survey Response Stats
Total Respondents: 36
Females: 18
Males: 18
All data collected August 9-11, 2018
TV or Not TV?
Will have a TV in their room 61% (78% of males; 44% of females)
Won’t have a TV in their room 39%
Device Most Used for Watching Video
Laptop or Desktop Computer 77% (82% of females; 72% of males)
Mobile Phone 20% (22% of males; 18% of females)
Traditional or Smart TV 3% (6% of males; 0% of females)
My count is up to 50 and I’m still working on it. God bless Gordon Keith and George Dunham.
1. Randy Cody the Contractor (my favorite)
2. Fake Tiger Woods
3. Dylan the argumentative teen
4. Ed Carter and his sports hotline
5. Fake Jerry Jones
6. Fake Jason Garrett
7. Chris Chris from Sales
8. Dr. Carleton Maxwell
9. Fake Mack Brown
10. Fake Michael Irvin, featuring school closings
11. Trapper John, M.D.
12. Marge Schimdittler — George Dunham’s high school swimming coach
13. Fake Jerry Jones, Jr. and/or Stephen Jones
14. Roosevelt (Jerry Jones’s right-hand gopher)
15. Fake Donald Trump
16. Mush Mouth Thomas
17. Ribby Paultz — sports expert
18. Spaulding (Jerry Jones’s grandson – University of Arkansas class of 2018)
19. Jimmy Amangiola of the Touchdown Brothers, Sports talk guys from Philadelphia
20. Fake Norm Hitzges
21. Fake Nolan Ryan
22. Fake Mark Cuban
23. Fake Chan Gailey – football coach
24. Fake George W. Bush
25. Fake Michelle Wie
26. Shorty Defazio (sounds a lot like Ribby Paultz)
27. Fake Charlotte Jones
28. Various fake animals (winner of Kentucky Derby, winner of Westminster Dog Show)
29. The Ticket Mouse
30. Fake Tony Romo
31. Deep Throat Informant (sounds like the Ticket Mouse with distortion)
32. Sports Panties
33. Dirty Doug Out (old baseball player who sounds like McGruff the crime-fighting dog)
34. Clarence Murphy, maintenance man
35. Fake Dirk Nowitzki
36. Fake Wade Phillips (Former Dallas Cowboys coach and son of Bum Phillips)
The Old Grey Wolf says it five days a week, with professional fluidity and consistency, yet most of us P1s can’t recite more than a few words of it. It varies ever so slightly day to day, but here is the general script.
Three thirty-three is our time. Thirty-three minutes past 3PM Central Standard time according to the tower of the friendly mercantile. The tuner is on America’s favorite radio station, Sportsradio 1310, The Ticket.
Warmest greetings, Tickheads and Ticketchicks, it is Thursday, the 9th of March.
Time to heed to, trice up, mill about smartly throughout the premises making certain every radio in sight is set to America’s favorite station for music and news and in doing whatever you must to ensure that this remains the case in perpetuity.
This is Mike Rhyner, speaking to you today from the nurturing biosphere of the mothership, alongside the The Knox City knocker, the Terlingua comic, Dingu, Ty Walker, the great beast in his natural habitat and the dancing bear at first base getting things ready to roll with that Ticket Ticker this afternoon.
At the helm, guiding us out to sea, sober with his hands on the wheel, the young gunslinger, David Mino.
Becca will be along in just a bit with traffico, traffico, and I will be here, but right about now it is time for us to bring in the Cobra.
Maybe you’ve heard the story. Maybe you’ve seen the photos. In case you haven’t, here’s the recap:
Forty-two years ago today, early in the morning of December 21, 1970, Elvis Presley showed up, unannounced, at the gates of the White House to deliver a letter he had written to President Richard Nixon.
Elvis wanted to meet with the President and he wanted the title and badge of Federal Agent for the Bureau of Narcotics and Dangerous Drugs. Elvis got everything he asked for. By lunchtime. That day.
How did Elvis do it?
THE BRAND: By 1970, sixteen years into his show biz career, Elvis Presley had evolved into Elvis. The bejeweled, cape-wearing, “See See Rider” singing, Vegas-playing Elvis. Elvis was a brand that everybody recognized and many respected. When Elvis showed up at the door — even the…
A friend of mine was recently asked, “If you could have any career you wanted, what would you be doing?” My friend said, “After all I’ve done in the last 20 years, I still have no clue what career would make me happy?”
My sage advice to him, and to anyone trying to answer this question, is to think back to the period in your life when you weren’t responsible for generating an income, say from ages 6 to 22. What did you like to do when nobody was telling you what to do or what you SHOULD do? When did that tuning fork go off in you heart? When did three or four hours pass so quickly you didn’t even look up? When were the times you surprised yourself and your peers that you could do something not everybody could do? For me those activities that resonated all had something to do with communication to an audience — writing, speaking, advertising, “slaying the great dragon of ambiguity” to help define and clarify something. What dragons do you like to slay?